Alice Violet {Birth Story}

It is hard to believe almost a month has gone by since our little girl was born. I have had plenty of time to write about our new lives, but I have been cuddling with her as much as possible during this sweet and fleeting phase.

And here she is: 

Alice Violet Wirth
Born February 24th, 2016

7 lbs 8 oz

19.5"

And she is absolutely perfect.

Jeff took some time off work on my due date (February 23rd) to take care of some last minute errands. He had the snow tires removed, got our brakes fixed, went grocery shopping, and took my phone to Batteries Plus to get the screen (that they broke) fixed. He stopped by my work to pick up my phone and grab a quick cup of coffee with me, and I snapped a picture of myself in the bathroom mirror to document the bump on my due date. This was the last I saw of my phone. Unfortunately, Batteries Plus ended up simply breaking my phone, and I lost all my pictures and videos from the last year. I spiraled into a hormonal frenzy, and I just knew that I would go into labor that night. When I was leaving work I felt the baby drop, and I had a hard time walking to my car with all the pressure on my pelvis.

That night I woke up at about 3:30am with intense contractions. I grabbed Jeff's phone and started playing Angry Birds to see if the contractions would go away, as they usually do. Turns out Angry Birds is a little stressful, so I put down the phone and checked my iPad to see if iCloud had backed up my most recent photos. It did, so I put my 40 week bump from my bathroom shot the day before on Instagram, then started timing contractions.

I had been contracting every night for about a week. Those contractions were semi-regular, lasting about 1 minute, and they averaged around 5-6 minutes apart. They were strong enough to take my breath away, but not nearly as strong as the ones I was feeling now. After 30 minutes of regular 30 second contractions every 3 minutes, I got out of bed and hopped in the shower. Jeff timed the contractions for me and called the hospital when I started bleeding after about 5 minutes in the shower.

I called my dad to come watch Everett. While we waited for him to arrive I got dressed, cleaned the house a little (I was such a wreck from the phone debacle that we left the house in a mess when we went to bed), packed a few miscellaneous items, finished filling out my hospital admit forms, found free hypnobirthing mp3's on Jeff's phone so they were ready to go, and had a quick snack (Jeff made himself eggs, hashbrowns, and sausage). After my dad arrived, we hopped in the car and had a relaxing drive across town to the hospital (compared to the last time when I was screaming at every pothole we hit).

I was anxious to get into a hospital suite so I could labor in the tub, but the nurses insisted on monitoring me in triage for 30 minutes before officially checking me in. They hooked me up to contraction and fetal heart rate monitors, insisting I labor flat on my back during that time so they could make sure the baby was okay. After being on the monitor - and my back - for 45 minutes they finally came back. In that time I had progressed from 4 cm to 5.5 cm. They hinted that I wasn't really in labor, and mentioned me possibly going home, to which I responded that I was 100% certain I was in labor. They left me in the little room for another 45 minutes, and I made the most of my time there by listening to the hypnobirthing tracks, walking around, using the bathroom, reading a book. My mom finally intervened and made the nurses check me in.

I was escorted into a GIANT labor and delivery room at Holy Family Hospital, and a new nurse was assigned to me. She was required to hook me up to the monitors again, and my heart sank a little. I knew from experience that this labor would go from 0 to 60, and I at least wanted a chance to deliver standing or kneeling, not glued on my back like I was with Everett. Of course, I was open minded about the way things would turn out, but I didn't want the hospital's procedures to derail my plans again. I asked if I could sit up, stand up, lay on my side while being monitored. Anything but on my back! Her response was, "Of course! I hate it how many women labor flat on their backs." An angel was sent to me! After a few minutes I could feel the contractions becoming stronger, and I asked if I could get in the tub. My awesome nurse agreed that those 15 minutes on the monitor had been enough. She showed Jeff how to fill up the tub, and I was in!

I cannot tell you how wonderful that water felt. It was the perfect warmth, and I felt every muscle in my body relax - including my uterus. I turned on another hypnobirthing track.

Then I was banshee screaming. I have NO idea what I was yelling, but my inner voice was saying, "You need to settle down. People can hear you." I was having one contraction on top of the next, and I could slowly feel a human head coming down the birthing canal. A flurry of nurses ran into the room and told me to get out of the tub and back into the bed.

"I CAN'T! THERE'S A BABY COMING!"

"It's okay. Just wait for the contraction to stop and we will get you out."

"IT'S NOT STOPPING! IT'S RIIIGHT THERE. THERE'S A BABY!"

"Okay, let me just check you...AAAAND SHE'S CROWNING! WHERE'S THE DOCTOR? PREPARE FOR DELIVERY!" Aside to the other nurses, "I don't think the doctor is going to get here in time. We might have to do it."

The nurses drained the tub quickly, stood me up, and had me shift my body slightly to the side so they could catch her. There were people crowded in the bathroom and I could see Jeff with a shocked expression on his face stuck on the other side of a barrier of health professionals. At the last minute I heard, "Emily, it's Dr. Fine. I'm going to deliver your baby now. Give me one push."

And she was out. The umbilical cord was wrapped pretty tightly around her neck so they had to rush her off, but before they did I got to see her screaming face. She looked exactly like Everett. Only covered in goop.

Below me was a mess of blood, water, and meconium, and dangling between my legs was an umbilical cord with a pair of scissors attached to the end. The doctor asked me to climb out of the tub to deliver the placenta, and I stood there awkwardly watching the scissors tick-tock between my thighs. "Ummmm."

Being in the tub for delivery was against the official rules, but it was nice because I could rinse all the "stuff" off my legs, and all the birthing grossness just washed down the drain. No cleanup required! And because I wasn't pushing the baby out, but instead contracting her downward naturally, I had very little birth trauma and was able to (awkwardly holding up my umbilical cord and the scissors with a towel) climb out of the tub and back to the bed with very little discomfort. 

Everett came to visit us in the hospital a few hours later and it was love at first sight. Being a big brother has been an adjustment for him, but he is such a good big brother. I am so proud of him.

His observations were that she was soft and fuzzy.

It took us over 24 hours to agree on her name. Jeff was set on Alice Mae, but I was set on Violet Mae. Obviously we compromised by dropping Mae and combining the two. 

Overall, our experience with the hospital birth this time around was 100% better than with Everett. Our angel nurse was incredibly supportive and knowledgeable when it came to breastfeeding, and the hospital has adopted new practices that are better for the baby - such as delaying the baby's first bath, and letting the baby nurse/cuddle rather than introducing a pacifier during the invasive hearing and PKU tests. AND my stomach only got kneaded ONCE! (They did it every 15 minutes with Everett.) My nurse found the practice completely unnecessary, so she didn't do it. They still use pitocin to deliver the placenta, but apparently that can't be helped. Fortunately, I know better from my last experience and questioned everything the nurses did, so was only offered a few drips of pitocin.

Having birthed on my back with Everett, I highly recommend standing to anyone interested in having an easy, natural delivery. My recovery was much faster this time, and I did not destroy my muscles by pushing, as gravity helped the baby naturally move downward. What does this mean? I actually have bladder control this time around and am not peeing my pants every 30 minutes! Also, hypnobirthing. I credit my speedy deliveries to the relaxation techniques taught by this method. 

For those wondering, here is what it looks like to be in natural labor using hypnobirthing techniques:

Here is what labor looks like on pitocin without an epidural:

I could barely think straight because I was in so much pain. And that was a small dose.

I came to find out later that the nurses only officially checked me into the hospital because of my insistence. Apparently the doctor was just going to induce me around 8:00 or 9:00. They did not think I was in labor because I was so calm through my contractions, but this is because labor is much easier if you breathe deeply (thanks yoga!) and relax.

And once the drugs wore off we were in hog heaven. 

And now we are home soaking up all the sweet baby snuggles.

Because her birth was so fast and furious, she did have some bruising, as well as a popped blood vessel in her eye. That has healed now, and she is officially flawless. 

38 Weeks Pregnant

I'm sitting here timing contractions and eating yogurt.

How do I feel?
Although this pregnancy journey has not been an easy one, I still have fears over what will come in the Beyond. It feels like this baby has been sucking the life out of me for 9 months, but I am not sure if having a newborn is easier/better than 1) not being able to lift my legs higher than 3 inches, 2) peeing my pants, 3) having heartburn so severe that I have bile in my mouth on a regular basis, 4) having swollen and numb extremities, 5) so many more disgusting complaints that it would be impossible to list all of them. My body is ready to NOT BE PREGNANT, but I also know that a baby will throw our lives into complete chaos. So, the body is there but the heart is not.

Please send positive vibes my way. These ankles could use all the loving thoughts and prayers you have to offer.

Speaking of ankles, I went to the Davenport Spa and got an amazing prenatal massage from their therapist Jill. It was one of the more heavenly experiences I've had. She rubbed my cankles so hard, and the swelling temporarily went down. I could use more Jill in my life.

Also, can I just say that we have the sweetest son in the whole world? I have a lot of mom guilt that I can't give him the attention I was once able to - such as playing cars/puzzles on the floor, dancing, and taking long walks. However, he has been such a trooper. He holds my hands to help me get up, and he rubs my back when he sees I am in pain. I hope every parent is as lucky as we are, because he is such a bright light in this world.

Weight gain?
38 lbs. 

Food cravings?
Milkshakes in any flavor.

Food aversions?
The smell of alcoholic beverages makes me feel nauseous. Not a food aversion per se, but body odor is completely disgusting to me right now.

Sleep?
Good and bad. I was averaging 4 hours a night for a while. The other night I finally pulled out the hypnobirthing CD and got myself back into a deep slumber. Sleep has been easier since then. I needed that reminder to put myself into a meditative state when falling asleep.

Movement?
I am still feeling movement, but it is not as intense. I'm thinking baby is running out of room. To compensate, my hips have gotten even wider. I did not think this was possible. My hips are basically killing me because of this.

Stretch marks?
Nope.

Bellybutton?
Innie and bursting at the seams.

Sex?
Pink.

Pregnancy is not kind to me. I feel like I've been robbed of all the wonderful pregnancy experiences some women have. As much as I want to have more kids, Jeff and I agree that we may need to throw in the towel after this one. I'm not sure if I mentioned this or not, but the day after I found out I was pregnant I broke out into hives and my eyes were swollen shut. This was the beginning of the next 9 months. The nausea started shortly after that, followed by severe SPD. Debilitating heartburn soon followed. Thank goodness my emotions have been okay. It's hard to lose my body and everything it was once capable of, but I continue to cope and I'm excited to get back more physical pieces of myself.

Baby Girl Nursery

Well, I finally did it. Besides needing to plug in the wipes warmer, the nursery is DONE.

I feel like I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. I put off this nursery project for WAY too long because 1) #secondchild, and 2) sometimes it takes a while for me to get inspired, especially when I'm not feeling my finest.

Remember how the room used to look like this?

I am happy to report that things are sanded, painted, moved, and nested! 

The walls were updated to Benjamin Moore Halo (mixed by Sherwin Williams because the BM store was closed and I needed paint THAT DAY). My mom helped me touch up Everett's old crib (that I found for $15 at a garage sale) with the same paint color we used on it for Everett's nursery: Valspar Gray Silt. The trim, doors, and baseboards were all repainted in Sherwin Williams's basic white trim paint. The ceilings were painted with Sherwin Williams Harmony (no VOC) in plain white. 

This will be my work space when I am telecommuting on maternity leave. The Alice in Wonderland calendar is from Rifle Paper Company. I always splurge and get something from the online store on Cyber Monday.

Everett had a good time helping us put this all together. He knew we were working while he slept, and each time he woke up he'd open the door and ask, "How does it look?" His favorite part was cleaning up his old crib. I had my bucket, and he had his. I want to remember these moments with just the two of us forever. He is such a great kiddo, and is going to be a really helpful big brother.

Back to the nursery. Clearly we need a little more decor. I am working on a mobile for the crib (Everett helped me get the supplies last night), and brainstorming art to put above the changing table.

I painted the desk (Target) and changing table (garage sale) with Annie Sloan Chalk Paint in Pure White. I can't say I loved working with the chalk paint, but it did the job. Now hopefully it won't chip/scratch because, as it turns out, chalk paint is chalky. I don't know why so many people go crazy over the stuff, but oh well.

The linens in the room are from Land of Nod. I just loved their Well Nested bedding, and the sheep on the changing pad cover caught my eye when we visited the store.

I think the room is officially ready for baby to come. Tonight's goals: packing hospital bags, sanitizing breast pump and parts, and making a dinner that is more complex than frozen pizza. 

It feels so good to go from this...

...to this...

We still need a bookshelf for the room, but we already know what we want, so we'll be making a trip to Ikea next time we visit family in Portland. Also, I definitely didn't make the crib skirt; my mom bought us one. I didn't want anyone thinking I had time for that task.

Special thanks to my MIL for coming all the way to Spokane to help me get things in order. It's because of her that we were able to finish the tough painting jobs and have enough clothes for a messy newborn.

The nugget just woke up from his nap, so it's time to go! 

Feeling Unprepared

Coordinating life to prepare for a second baby is much more challenging than with the first. Everett is such a good helper, which I love, but naturally his presence can be more of a hindrance than anything when a deadline is in place: February. Most of our prep work must then be done after he goes to bed, but after working a 9-hour shift while pregnant, I can tell you the last thing I want to be doing at 8pm is painting/laundry/planning. As a result, I have done a lot of hiding my head and pretending that things will eventually work themselves out. Not a good solution.

Last week my boss shut down work an hour early, and I danced (with a waddle) a victory dance out the door. A WHOLE HOUR TO MYSELF. To tackle this giant mess...

This is the nursery. Don't judge! I honestly wish I had a before picture from a few weeks ago, because it was even worse.We have managed to purge a couch, chest freezer, TV stand, old chandelier, and queen box spring, and now we are left with this. This room has been a catchall for months, so much of the setback has been from our organizing the rest of the house before facing the nursery design.

It is amazing what one can get accomplished in an hour, especially when it is during a period of the day that isn't plagued by heartburn. I wouldn't necessarily say I've made a New Year's resolution, but I have definitely been better about writing things down and making lists to organize my thoughts after the chaos of the holidays. Doing this helps me compartmentalize things, as well as prioritize, and pregnancy brain is a bit more controlled when there is a visual reminder. A whole hour last week gave me the chance to create a list, as well as begin a few of the more daunting items.

By setting realistic goals for myself ("I will accomplish 3 large tasks on my list over the weekend."), I finally feel like I can pull myself together to get things in place for when the baby comes. As we speak, car seat covers and baby clothes are being laundered. We have manged to blow through many of the projects on the to-do list, and we have managed to add many more. I call this progress. This weekend we plan to install the car seat bases, which blows my mind that we are at this point already. Soon we will be packing our bags and putting our contacts on 24/7 alert.

Baby is coming!

32 Weeks Pregnant

Pregnancy is a funny thing. Some women love it, some women hate it. 

Today I told myself I will no longer have heartburn, so this is the way it is going to be from now on. I'm hoping my body remembers the conversation we had, because we still have a long way to go.

I overheard a group of retired (read: old and creepy) men at church commenting on my pregnancy glow, and how beautiful pregnant women truly are (read: they were staring at my chest). The irony being that, at this exact moment, I was swallowing heartburn bile, wiping my bloody nose, suffering from a contraction that was radiating down my left leg, and trying not to cry after a woman suggested I was having twins. This last thing is a major blow. I don't remember it happening so much with my first pregnancy, but people continue to comment on how HUGE I am. I checked with the doctor, and he says I gained the exact amount of weight at this point in my first pregnancy. When I search Google for images, other women are the same size I am at 32 weeks. Why are people so insensitive in 2015-almost-2016? It's a bad, BAD time to be pregnant.

I am almost ashamed to post pictures of my side belly. Here I am. Getting over my shame. Please congratulate me and call me Woman. Also...my boobs could not get any bigger. Just putting it out there.

How do I feel?
I have good days and bad days. Even on the good days, I do not think my hips can possibly spread any further. My heartburn is excruciating, often waking me up in the middle of the night by implanting bile in my mouth. It's really fun. I especially enjoy feeling like I'm going to puke every time I bend over to pick up my son.

Weight gain?
26 lbs. Don't gasp. I didn't when I stepped on the scale.

Food cravings?
Avocados! Dairy seems to temporarily relieve the heartburn, so I sometimes sneak a couple scoops of ice cream before bed. I'll run it off after the baby comes.

Food aversions?
Peanut butter. It exacerbates the heartburn.

We had a cookie exchange at work the other day. Cookie exchanges are magical, except every single cookie is different, but they are all mingling together in the cookie jar, which means every cookie tastes like peppermint peanut butter. Hmmmm...I think I'll eat a cookie now - one that hasn't been tainted by "other" cookies.

Sleep?
I will usually wake up once during the night. To get back to sleep I pick up the iPad and read a book until I fall back asleep. No complaints here.

Movement?
Lots of movement! There seem to be a lot of elbow and knee thingamajigs.

Stretch marks?
Not yet.

Bellybutton?
Innie. I don't think this is going to change.

Sex?
It's a girl. :)

In conclusion, STOP CALLING ME FAT. Your mom's fat.

Book Club {2}

Well, we are all alive. Barely.

It has been a stressful and terrifying week for a lot of people in the Spokane area. Last Tuesday there was a terrible storm that knocked out power for 90% of the city. For most people, power was restored within 5 days, but many are still in cold houses, and will be eating out for Thanksgiving. The stress of the week caused us to cancel our Thanksgiving trip, and we are pretty bummed. However, the uncertainty and fears that come with being without power in the dead of winter - worrying about damage to our house from the storm, constantly wondering when the pipes would burst from the cold, and wearing the same outfit every day - was just too much for us to handle on top of packing for a road trip. So, we are home for the holidays.

One of the only things you can do to escape the stresses of life in a power outage is to read. This is why I thought now would be an appropriate time to list all my favorite books I've ready over the last few months. Hopefully you have some camping equipment on hand, just in case you are reading in the dark like we were.

Me Before You. This book came as a recommendation from my coworker, and it is deeeeeelightful. If you liked The Fault in Our Stars, you will also love this. The protagonist is such a refreshing character, and I had a hard time putting the book down. There is a sequel called Me After You, and I will be reading it ASAP! In fact, I already have my name on the waitlist for it at the library.

Luckiest Girl Alive. A lot of people are comparing this book to Gone Girl. The danger of doing this is that you keep reading, expecting the same Gone Girl twist. News flash: it never comes. Which is good! No one likes a copycat! There are still surprising events, but not the same shocking plot twist that happen in Gillian Flynn's novel. The main character in Luckiest Girl Alive is not so likable on the outside, but her inner monologue reminds us that people always have a reason for behaving the way they do. I appreciated the themes covered in this book, particularly from her high school experiences, and I think this is a relevant read for the issues we face in today's chaotic world.

Just Mercy. This is a nonfiction book every American should read. When someone from the Pacific Northwest talks about racism in the United States, we have NO idea what "racism" really means. We can read articles online and hear stories in the media, but we never really understand without witnessing firsthand what goes on in our world, EVEN TODAY. This book is just...the best. Read it now. Especially if you are white.

Maude. This book is a biography written by Maude's granddaughter Donna. At first I was a little turned off by the voice of the book, but soon realized it was written as if Maude herself was telling me these stories firsthand. This amazing woman went through everything: World War I, the Spanish Influenza, the Great Depression, World War II, and so many other important historic (and personal) events. Despite these hardships, she presented herself with grace. She is an inspiration to Woman, and her strength is inspiring. I wish I could have known her. I hope you own a Kindle/iPad, because the e-version of this book is much cheaper than the paperback.

Wild. Another nonfiction, but this one is an autobiography. I think most people have read this book, but it is worth mentioning here just in case. I love stories of redemption, and I love hiking, so this book was a good read for me. Although I do not agree with all the life choices she made, I am inspired by Cheryl Strayed's resiliency. Heck, I don't even think she agrees with all the life decisions she's made! This story encourages you to find your true self through deep reflection and nature. Along this same genre, I also read Into the Wild. However, I do not list this second book as a "favorite" here because I feel Christopher McCandless had a mental illness and/or personal trauma that lead to his decisions, and ultimately his death. The poor kid needed help, and instead chose to withdraw. Please know that Wild and Into the Wild are very different stories.

The Language of Flowers. I'm starting to see a pattern in modern literature: brokenness and redemption. This book has these same themes, but with flowers. It is another delightful read about love and life. The main character uses flowers to convey her emotions, and I loved learning what each flower represents.

Chestnut Street. Good ole Maeve. She just had a way of writing delightful books. This is a collection of stories from people who live on Chestnut Street in Dublin, Ireland. Although each chapter focuses on a different character (as many of Maeve's books do), I loved hearing about each person's story, and always wanted to know more. I had a smile on my face at the end of the story, which is never a bad thing when it comes to reading.

A Shift in the Air. Wow, this list is getting long. But we are ending it with a goooood one because everyone needs a little werewolf erotica in their lives. The Elemental Shifter Series is certainly entertaining, and don't worry, it is not raunchy romance like Fifty Shades of Grey. There is more story than there is...you know...werewolf sex. I do not feel bad for saying this, because I think the author would say it too, her first book in the series is not as good as the second book. So why did I read the second book after reading a mediocre first book? Because my friend edited it! Which is obviously why the second book is so much better. Duh. Despite these facts, the first book isn't really that bad. It just isn't as well written as the second, which means it's already better written than Fifty Shades of Grey. Anyway, if you are looking for a fun read, or if you are a closet romance novel enthusiast, you should definitely try this series.

------------

That's probably enough for now. As I mentioned, I have my name on the waitlist for a couple books at the library, but I am always taking suggestions. Suggest away!

Halloween 2015

Halloween this year was one to remember. I wish I could go back and experience the day again, and I would not change a thing. Not even the windy and stormy weather.

Jeff had to work in the morning, but he managed to find the last pumpkin available on the South Hill before heading out for a couple hours. We carved our pumpkin, lit candles, played catch, roasted pumpkin seeds, took a nap, and watched Curious George. When Jeff got home we ate pizza, then snatched a ton of candy. We decided to go trick-or-treating with Everett's cousins this year. It was helpful for him to go with other kids, especially ones he knows well. They were incredibly patient and helped him at every house.

Dropped the spoon inside the pumpkin and is pretty disgusted by the texture.

I finished Everett's costume a few days before Halloween, which gave him plenty of time to get used to the idea of wearing it. The last two years he wanted nothing to do with costumes. Now that he has some autonomy, I let him decide what he wanted to be, he watched me sew the costume, and we tried it on once a day "to make sure it still fits."

Everett was adamant about being a lion. Since I needed a pattern stat (no time for shipping), and since Joann's was having a sale on patterns (only $1.99 per pattern!), I had to get a little creative with what they had in stock. I settled on Simplicity 1351 and made a couple adjustments.

Using the raccoon template, the body of the costume was pretty much the same, but obviously I did not need to put a mask on the hood, as this was where the mane would be going. I also skipped the tail part, as lions do not have raccoon tails. The mane was created with strips of felt, looped then sewed down. I wanted to use a fleece fabric for this part, but could not find the shade of orange I wanted. Se la vie.

At the end I felt kind of lazy. I am pretty sure I skipped all the hardest parts of the pattern (face applique, tail), but this was what he wanted, and you have to give the people what they want. E was incredibly cozy on the cold, autumn day. AND I spent less than $20 for the whole ensemble. Thanks Joann's! 

Speaking of Halloween and cold weather, what's the point dressing little girls in princess costumes? They either end up freezing, or they have to wear a jacket over their gown! I guess having a warm Halloween is one benefit of living in the southern half of the country.

Costume 2014 / Costume 2013