Please, please, please do not say these words to me. I will only respond back, "Ummmmmm...do you know what winter is? Because you're in for a big surprise if you think this is it."
Look around you folks! It's FALL!
|At Greenbluff with a 35 week bump.|
|Mowing down on my third pumpkin doughnut. No excuses!|
|Our annual tradition of watching a pumpkin get shot from a cannon.|
|47 pounds of pumpkins...Did we go overboard?|
|One's pumpkin has the power to speak a thousand words.|
How do I feel?
Ouch. Let me just say I've taken exactly 3 Tylenol during my pregnancy: one when I had excruciating implantation cramping, one six hours ago, and one 2 hours ago. My head feels like it's going to explode and my feet are swollen to the max, but my round ligaments haven't felt better in...well, months. Thanks Tylenol!
Mostly things that involve any form of chocolate or pumpkin (pumpkin chocolate chip bread from Great Harvest was an excellent find the other day). Hot chocolate and chocolate Muscle Milk (duh) have been necessities in my diet for the last 2 weeks.
I am not anti as far as any foods go, but recent adventures have taught me that adding pepper to any dish is a terrible idea: heartburn - gonna be pissed if this kid comes out bald.
I'm still waking up at 3:00 every morning. And when I actually can sleep, my dreams have been so vivid it is sometimes hard to discern them from reality (I'm still not convinced my friend Ruth isn't my midwife). During my 3am wakefests, the goal is to roll from my right side to my left. Oftentimes, this venture takes up to 10 minutes, with a slight pause when I get stuck on my back. My most unsuccessful attempt was the other night when I rolled halfway over, only to have the cat climb on my stomach and start purring while I was stuck on my back. It was a cute gesture, but I wanted to throw her across the room. However, there was no way I could possibly reach over to grab her, so I just stayed there and twisted my upper torso as far to the side as possible. My leg was numb when I woke up.
Is it possible for him to be scratching me with his fingernails? Sometimes I have an intense, sharp pain when he moves, and it feels exactly like someone is scratching my insides. I'm thinking he is so crammed in there the movement is starting to get painful.
People, I thought I found a stretch mark on my stomach yesterday. It was right next to my bellybutton and about 2 inches long. However, it turned out to be an indentation from my shirt. Phew! I hope my luck continues.
Boy. And I even had the doctor confirm in an impromptu ultrasound! He owed me one...see below.
What have I learned?
Sorry for the TMI on this one, but I really did learn something this week --
So I had my first internal exam yesterday.
WHY DIDN'T ANYONE WARN ME?! Ohmygawd I never knew something considered so "routine" could cause so much pain. Pregos and future pregos beware. Prepare yourselves for this because I'm thinking it will be good practice for pain management when delivery comes.
While I was being inspected, we discovered I'm 50% effaced (I have no idea what that means) and slightly dilated. It was this slight dilation that caused Doc to GO BACK IN FOR SECONDS. Not only did I get a thorough examination, but he wanted to DOUBLE CHECK his work by cramming his arm inside me a second time. "Don't be surprised if you have a little bit of spotting after this." No medical procedure can be pleasant when the doctor follows up your appointment with this statement.
With wounded pride and the feeling of being mutilated, I went home and ate a lot of pancakes (sans chocolate chips). Jeff was so sweet. He witnessed the whole affair and made sure I was comfortable for the rest of the evening. He even agreed to watching two episodes of The Vampire Diaries with me (I know he secretly liked it), and let me cuddle with him the whole time. Maybe I should get violated more often.
Whelp, ever since then I've been having more regular and painful contractions. This prompted me to download a contraction timer app on my iPhone to help keep track of how frequently they are occurring. In conclusion, I don't want to go back to the doctor.